Taking a closer look at the screenshot... The little profile/comment and the story? Definetly does not belong there. It's cool enough to have, but it shouldn't be in these video descriptions. It's especially just going to be annoying for regulars who already know the players and actively follow the game anyway.
Info like download and HD link belongs at the bottom IMO. If it should even be there at all - because once again subscribers/regulars will already be aware of these things, and I don't see why a profile description, linking to a download page isn't enough.
Previous record... Sort of the same as the other part about people already being aware of this or capable of finding out on their own. I wouldn't mind having it there, as it doesn't fill very much on its own.
Music credit and stuff I guess is the most respectful thing to do, but it belongs at the very bottom. It almost is that here already too

Info at the end also seems a bit meaningless IMO.
This is sort of not only a deal because of it being tl;dr and most people not being interested in half of it (or more), but also because when you open description it means you need to scroll further down to reach the comments... Which IS annoying, even though that is also a minor thing. Overall I really don't care much, but I easily can agree with long description being stupid.
Sorry if this ends up being a double post.

Edit: In other words I approve of the above posters template.
I also approve of the two first screenshots RRD (mindscarp, right?) show... I assume he thinks they're worse. They're alot better IMO and only give me exactly what I need to know. Also easily prefer the symbols gone, now that I see the same text without them.
Edit: Completely forgot to mention that music added in the videos in the first place probably shouldn't be done anyway. I assume all recorders will have cameras that give fine audio, and if people want to listen to music rather than in-game sounds, they can play their own music.